she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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