i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
