What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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