Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
