Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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