3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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