get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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