Kiss
Puke
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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