You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
