fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize