I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize