Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
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