i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
