I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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