So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
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