Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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