Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
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