I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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