sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
