Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
