Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
