I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
