I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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