Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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