he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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