Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Randomize
