3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
