We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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