I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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