His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I just had sex on a roof
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
