; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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