? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Randomize
