I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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