Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
