I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
