Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize
