Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
