Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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