possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
