Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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