Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize