how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
