ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
He did a backflip because drugs
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize