You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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