Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
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