she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
