I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
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