Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
