He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
