so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Randomize